September 25th, 2011

I’ve been so angry at what life has been throwing at me, I feel that I am so blinded by my frustration. Things haven’t been going the way I thought it should, the way I thought it would. My frustrations have led me to making really stupid decisions, which I am ashamed of and live to regret them but let’s not go there.

I still don’t understand many things that are happening around me. People always say things happen for a reason but, why is this prolonged? I know God always make things work for good for those who love Him, but I still have so many queries, why? I feel like I am constantly having a internal conflict with myself. I guess this has got to stop, soon, before I actually become a nutcase.

I wish you’d let me see, see something that I can hold on to, make me understand. Then again, it is faith I have in you that keeps me running back to you every time. I wish you’d stop protecting me from all the truths. I deserve to know, don’t I?

Searching for something more.

I search for You God of strength
I come to You in my brokenness

Love,
Laine. 

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September 3rd, 2011

So many things just happened and I haven’t even got the time to chew and think about them one by one.

One.
Too many farewells.

Two.
Beginnings.

Three.
Busyness.

Four.
Void.

Five.
Loss.

If there was a way around all these, a pause button, or a forward button perhaps like how the movie “Click” was, it would be really great. For now, it’s just me and the world, waiting to be conquered.

Life is like a ferris wheel, you can’t be at the top forever. Life’s like that. Learn.

Love, Laine.

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With An AIM

May 13th, 2011

If you didn’t know (I’m sure most of you did not), I was attending a short leadership course (AIM) that was held by my church for the last 3 1/2 months. It is a course where youths come together to set aside the fist few months of our lives for God.

The AIM team! Ee Laine, Evelyn, Elijah, Martha, Rebecca, Mary Ann

We are a crazy bunch.
We do the silliest things that we sometimes shouldn’t do but do so anyway. We get “sounding”  from the top but even that couldn’t break our spirits to do the things we envisioned to do. These peeps that I see everyday made my days worth while. Although we may all have our different quirks that set each other off and had our obstacles to overcome, we definitely worked well together (on and off “site” I must say). If you didn’t already know, Elijah is the only man in the house. He “protects” us, as best as he can after taking care of himself first of course and supposedly portrays a more, shall we say manly character? :)

We all had one aim and I guess that was what brought us all together. They reminded me of CHS CF, one big family, just that this was on a smaller scale. We joked and carried each other’s burden together on our shoulders to get to our goal. Oh yes and the fact that we make each other look silly in front of others too, as a team.

My clown friend.

The only man in the house, is Elijah Peter 😉

The Twins!

No shame, no gain.

Non-sensing in the van on the way back from Calvary Land.

When we had our graduation two weeks ago from today, I had a lot of things going through my mind. I thought about how much I’ve grown with these people I barely knew just 4 months ago. About how I used to have to throw a ball so that everyone else could just keep it rolling, or when we were all so shy to ask each other for favours, or how every recess there was so much of awkwardness hanging thick in the air. I would say that all that has changed now. We do not have those awkward silence where all of us will have nothing to say at all because we’re afraid that we’re going to offend someone else, or me making small conversations just to keep everyone talking. Now, it just comes naturally to us, as if we are childhood friends.

I will miss all of you, as I have already said countless times but no matter how many times I say it, it doesn’t make me miss you all any less.
Wishing all of you the best as you carry on with your studies girls (and guy)!

Love, Laine.

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2010, A year like no other

December 31st, 2010

This year had definitely been a year like no other.

It was was great because I had friends that were there for me through the struggles in life. These were the peeps who made me who I am here today, to tell the world what they have done in my life. I must thank God for every struggle/difficulty/obstacle that has come my way because indeed He had a greater plan and He always had a way out planned for me.

Introducing the MEH 8!

fr R : Twan Ting, Yiyin , Jocelyn, Ee Laine, Daphne, Joanne , Germaine & Yee Teng

School life was much more bearable with them around. If I would to sum us up in 10 words it would be:
crazily cold and everything you would ever want to have
am I good or what? haha

Each of us with our unique personality and when mixed together, turned out as the best recipe ever! When we started out as mere acquaintances we never did dream/know that we would be where we are today, the best of friends/hangout buddies! I am definitely grateful for all the memories we had together. These two years with you girls were the best years of my secondary school life and I have learnt how to be more accepting because of all of you. We shared our experiences, jokes/coldness/38ness/knowledge with each other and it is a life lesson even more precious than gold or silver.

THANKS GIRLS!

Then there were others too who made it all memorable too :

The Christian Fellowshippers or more commonly addressed as the Cfers


Above is a picture of an almost complete set of Cfers.

I have really grown in CF in the 5 years I’ve been there and one of the things I will miss after school is my Fridays spent with this bunch of people filled with the Joy of the Lord. These brothers and sisters in Christ that I have grown to love and fellowship over the years, not to mention my seniors who have put in so much effort to nurture us who later took over the CF after they were done with their duties are the invaluable. The difference between them and my other friends is that we have the same vision in mind and a common goal to achieve. We encourage each other when there is the need to and to cheer on the passion to reach the lost and to be an impact. I must thank God for the friends I’ve made here in CF especially Wai Leem and Aaron Ng who have been there for 5 years with moi (: It was a pleasure serving alongside you all and may the journey ahead be an even greater one for all of you blessed children of God.

Leslie Koon

I hereby declare you underweight!
Come on, work on those muscles! 😛

Ok I must say that you’ve been a good friend but don’t let this get to your head or I’ll take it back. With your humour you can go far but with your attempt to annoy people sometimes, that’s gonna get you in trouble (I’m just saying). Nonetheless I wanted to say thanks for lending me your ear when I needed it and being the “life of the party” most of the time. You also never failed to keep things moving (many times in Chinese class & during free periods) and say something really dumb to make us all *smack our heads. I also wish you all the best girlfriend in everything that you do and pursue in the future 😉
p/s: I want to get my license before you do! I am determined to do so at least.

Eric Marc

I couldn’t have asked for a better friend. Period (:

Cheers, macha.

The BM tuition peeps:

We may not be the smartest but we sure are the noisiest! Khin Khuin says we are BFFTs, Best Fiends For Tuition. You guys are annoyingly fun to be with. Here’s a toast to great tuition buddies!

THE Cell Group

The one and only cg who has a name to it, yup you got it right, the one and only. We’re called the Lame’ols because we can’t stop laming during lessons and we’re all too random. Plus if you’re looking for a cg, you should come join us. Did I tell you that we always have food? Or at least most of the time :)

Let me tell you briefly about how our cg is, a cg itself.
I : loud and random, Kerby : deep thoughts, Adam : sick jokes, Josh D : blurness, Jared : laughter, Kimmie : cheekiness, Lawrence : his absence :( , Annabelle : lessons and FOOD!

Not to forget

My FAMILY

In every relationship there is surely to be its ups and downs, I guess it does apply in a family as well. It was a very important year for me and these individuals were the ones who put up with my crazy mood swings and what nots along the way. I’ve learnt to be grateful for what I have and to not complain about things I do not own from my dad because what I have is more than sufficient. My mum taught me to be more loving towards my siblings (I am still working on that) and to be more patient. Kel advices me not to repeat his own mistakes he once did and regretted and Jo, never fail to get on my nerves yet she surprises me with a new talent everyday 😉

There’s also the other relatives that I’ve spent my last two weeks of the year with, of which I am grateful for although I fell sick.

Had a great time with them girls in Afamosa. We are crazy when put together and I love it that way. Already missing you girls and can’t wait for you girls to come to my place. Till we meet and go crazy again! :)

Most of you may or may not know that I was in Singapore for a week and stayed for Christmas as well. The 8 days days was spent with my cousins, nephews, niece and of course my very own family. Most of my days in Singapore were spent with the two very lovely nephew and niece shown in the above picture. They, in the course of 8 days have clung on to me, my sister and my brother during dinners and trips to the malls and it melts my heart to have them around. It wasn’t easy for me to say my goodbyes to them the day we left because I really enjoyed my time spent with them and I am sure they did too.

There was also the Christmas dinner that was the event of the year for me.
There’s no place like home, and this is what I call HOME!

So have a blessed 2010 and this is my present to all you loved ones out there.

Much apologies if you were not mentioned!

Love,
Laine.





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Stars & Lights

October 7th, 2010

If you know (or you may not!) I’ve been trying to write a song (a complete one, not like the half done) but it wasn’t an easy task. I have a crazy eccentric friend by the name of Jocelyn Khoo Pei Lin who actually came up to me and told me that we should write a song together because she had a melody in mind but no words for it. So that’s how we started off, as a team (actually we were already a team before this) to satisfy our need to get prow into each other’s mind.

Had 2 brainstorming sessions with Jocelyn Khoo before we finally settled on the lyrics of our first song together. It’s mostly her words, and just me contributing to the voicing and ideas. We really enjoyed the time together just sitting on the floor in my room with the bean bag, voice recorder, paper & pencil and guitar in hand talking about almost everything under the sun, yes even things unrelated to the song. After hours of laughing, crying, criticising and thinking, a song was born! Jocelyn gave birth to it.

Squeeze those brain juice won’t ya!

So here’s to anyone and everyone who still reads this blog!

Stars & Lights

I lost my step over the edge I feel more alive
Can you hear it is in sight?
The world’s a blur I can feel it’s wind
Moving further it makes me think

The rain has taken its bow
The stars and lights are all that I see now
But you’ll never know
The way that your sound’s tracking my life

I’m looking at the sky through refraction on reverse
Help me I’m to high invisible from the hurt
The world’s  blur I can feel it’s wind
Moving further it makes me think

The rain has taken its bow
The stars and lights are all that I see now
But you’ll never know
The way that your sound’s tracking my life

Jocelyn Khoo & Ee Laine
2/10/2010

This is our small humble beginning 😉
Now, time to brew more ideas.
I must say, you’ve been my inspiration Pei Lin (:

p/s: Don’t mind our poor quality recording 😉

Love,
Laine.

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Spur of the Moment

October 2nd, 2010

I felt rather down the other day and decided maybe I’ll just try taking some pictures. It wasn’t so easy because I had to put my camera on timer and focus it and such but I did it, yes I DID IT. This is my first project in a sense, without really having anything in mind so the results were rather unfruitful but nonetheless here they are.

Took them with my floral print dress and a rose.

In black & white.

2 best pictures for display. Indulge!

Love,
Laine.

Taken on Sept 7th

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First Special No.

April 4th, 2010

I did my first ever special number at the 2nd soft launch of Calvary Contemporary Service last Sunday and I must say it was quite an eye opening experience. I played and sang along with Aileen and Patrina, who was playing as well. I was scared out of my wits during the whole special number (if my singing didn’t give it away, my strumming pattern did). Nonetheless, we made it through, alive fortunately. (: Thanks for all the support, really appreciate it. I also wanna thank Kevin! Who was being ever so patient with us when we were figuring out the arrangement of the song and for being so supportive!

Aileen, myself and Patrina.Whenever this guy is around, well let’s just say he never fails to bring out this side of me.Nerds of the century! (oh the irony)

Love,
Laine.

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Last Weekend

March 27th, 2010

I love this! Aaron’s phone’s templates are so kewl!! If you do not know, in the middle is our very own CF president, Au Yong. Clockwise from top is Jaclyn, Aaron, Timot and me. Awesome! More photo taking with your phone the next CF meeting Aaron? (:

My weekend with my cousins. I miss you guys already.

Before watching Alice In Wonderland.

Hi-tea! Ever wonder why there’s always a long queue when you drive pass Klebang? Well, wonder no more! This is why!

They serve pretty good coconut shakes! I think it’s about RM2.50 for one. For the special, which is in the picture above (means extra ice-cream on top=more fat btw) is RM3. I think so. Their nasi lemak is good too, spicy belacan is the way to go!

Jonker Street!

Satay celup for supper.

Last but not least, meet Farida the new CF guitar!

Isn’t she a beauty? Though I think she’s a tad bit too fair, don’t you think?

Love,
Laine.

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Reality

March 10th, 2010
I have nothing more to give. I am, VOID.
I try to rid of this feeling but somehow when I am alone, in my room with myself, reality slowly nibbles in again. Try to run from reality all you want, it always catches up with you.
Times like these where your faith is stretched to your limit, you either break or become a stronger person.

C.S.Lewis Song – Brooke Fraser

I find this, very true.

C.S.Lewis Song – Brooke Fraser

If I find in myself desires nothing in this world can satisfy,
I can only conclude that I was not made for here
If the flesh that I fight is at best only light and momentary,
then of course I’ll feel nude when to where I’m destined I’m compared

[CHORUS]
Speak to me in the light of the dawn
Mercy comes with the morning
I will sigh and with all creation groan as I wait for hope to come for me

Am I lost or just found? On the straight or on the roundabout of the wrong way?
is this a soul that stirs in me, is it breaking free, wanting to come alive?
Cos my comfort would prefer for me to be numb
An avoid the impending birth of who I was born to become

[BRIDGE]
For we, we are not long here
Our time is but a breath, so we better breathe it
And I, I was made to live, I was made to love, I was made to know you
Hope is coming for me
Hope, He’s coming

Love,
Laine.

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When Worlds Collide

March 10th, 2010

When  different worlds collide, you get an abstract work of art.

p/s- Need a break or and getaway. A jamming session would be great. Jocelyn, we need this.

Love,
Laine.

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